Monday, December 19, 2011

She Wants Revenge 5/29/08 (Surge)

She Wants Revenge at H.O.B.

By Michael Wood
For Weekly Surge
Probably the least likely show to be held at the House of Blues on Memorial Day weekend - as bikers whizzed by for Atlantic Beach Bikefest and urban music filled the air - would be the new wave revivalist act She Wants Revenge.
So Sunday, May 17, I headed up to the old H.O.B. to see the show. This tour is sponsored by and run by Nylon, a fashion and pop culture magazine. They had plenty of Nylon merch for sale, as did the bands (some pretty interesting stuff including shorts and panties with the bands' names and logos on them), and all the TVs in the venue were playing "Nylon TV" before the show and in between band sets. Nylon TV is basically the hipsters guide to fashion and music (just like the magazine). The show was playing bands such as The Kills, Tilly and The Wall, and MGMT while electronic music played in between each band's set. And they had a photo booth that you could take your picture in and find your picture online. So as the hip teenagers with their freshly bought shirts from the merch booth and their super tight jeans neared the stage, the show began.
Up first was Switches, from London. From the beginning of the set, Switches started with what seemed to be a sound heavily influenced by Wire and perhaps other late '70s post punk bands. The playful yet artsy sound that started the show quickly developed into less creative, yet catchy pop songs, complete with four-part harmonies. Switches was able to keep it quirky and interesting with some weird synth sounds and a fun electronic hand clap beat that came up in a couple of the songs. They were full of energy and sass. It was quality Brit Rock, but not the resurrection of rock 'n' roll or anything. I was half-way amused.
The next band, from New York, was The Virgins, and the band members looked young enough to actually be virgins. Much like the first band, The Virgins started out on a different vibe than where it landed in the middle of the set. This seemed to be early '80s- influenced power-pop, with some nods to some dance-y soul. There were some interesting things going on musically that lead me to believe it would be better on CD than live. The one thing that I can say that was consistent about these guys were the bass lines, they had really good bass lines. But eventually they ended up just sounding like a Strokes rip-off. And if Nylon is so fashion forward, how did they let the singer get on stage wearing a sleeveless Nike shirt?


Photo by Stefano Giovannini
The co-headliners of the evening were Be Your Own Pet, from Nashville, Tenn. BYOP had gained some notoriety from touring with Sonic Youth. Much like touring with Sonic Youth, this is another tour that just doesn't seem to fit. But the group hit the stage with fury and urgency. After seeing two bands with well-crafted and carefully delivered pop songs, it was nice to see four kids just get up on stage and deliver fast and abrasive punk rock. Singer Jemina had a great onstage persona, or lack thereof, as she was spazzing out and jumping around. It sounded like what I'd imagine Bikini Kill would if still around - and had some melody. BYOP is an excellent live band. They had the crowd dancing spastically like and having a great time.
Finally, California-based She Wants Revenge hit the stage. SWR is only a two-piece band in the studio: Justin Warfield and Adam 12. But live they take a whole band with them. At first I thought that this would take away from their electronic sound but it didn't, being that the drums were half-electronic pads, and a lot of their songs are keyboard driven.
She Wants Revenge takes some dark influences such as Joy Division and Bauhaus and meshes it with '80s new wave and dance influences. They paint images of dance clubs and sex. Sometimes the lyrics are a little cheesy, but live you don't have to pay attention to the words and you can just dance. Warfield and Adam 12 put on an excellent show, playing mostly songs from the group's second record, "This is Forever", and a few from the new EP, "Save Your Soul." They had the crowd dancing and the vibe was really good.
Then some guys decided to start moshing. While singing, Warfield (who sometimes very similar to Placebo's Brian Molko) was distracted when he saw the moshers and could not help but laugh mid-lyric. The meatheads in the mosh pit did not ruin everyone's good time and this was an overall great show. On a side note, all the bands used amps that had Barack Obama's face painted on them with the word "HOPE" underneath his face.
It was nice to see that these were bands were trying to say something while at the same time trying to get the audience on its feet and dancing.

Dressy Bessy Review (Surge 9/18/08)

DRESSY BESSY, SQUAAKS, WICKED GIFT AT PIRATE'S COVE

By Michael Wood
For Weekly Surge
On Sunday, Oct. 5, Dressy Bessy - a playful punk/pop combo from Denver - played its second-to-last night of a two-week tour at North Myrtle Beach's Pirate's Cove. The band has been around since 1996 and has released six albums and has been featured in the film "But I'm A Cheerleader" and also "The Power Puff Girls" television show. Dressy Bessy is also part of the Elephant Six collective, which is a group of musicians that were very important to the independent music scene in the late '90s.
The opener of the evening was Myrtle Beach's own Wicked Gift. Wicked Gift has been playing around town since 2002. Singer/songwriter Phil Fox is the only original member of the band left in the current lineup. As the show was getting started, with Fox sitting on a stool, they took the idea of a casual start to a new level. Just as the first song was getting started, Fox went into an almost Indian-like voice solo and the guitars were moody and atmospheric, the song stopped short as lead guitarist Sam Favata took a bathroom break. He did his business, then came back to get the show on the road. No word on whether he washed his hands. They quickly jumped into a set of catchy pop tunes and the whole floor was filled with people dancing. Take bits and pieces from The Police, The Beatles, Talking Heads and They Might Be Giants and you have an idea of what to expect out of these guys. Fox's songwriting is professional-sounding, yet quirky. His lyrics are usually in a storytelling nature, and are always smart and witty. Drew Jacobs' bass lines are solid, yet spacious, which gives the outfit an aura of early soul and funk. Favata's leads are not too jam band-esque to make only Phish fanatics happy, but just noodle-y enough to make any music geek impressed. Wicked Gift gives the impression of four professional musicians that probably either currently or previously played the bar/cover scene but have this band as their real creative outlet. The Gift managed to kick-start the night in dance mode.
Up next was Squuaks, from Baltimore. They were on tour as direct support for Dressy Bessy. They play relatively diverse indie rock. The first couple of songs sounded like an amped up Television, or maybe Pavement, but with some obvious country influences thrown in. Guitarist Justin Custer wore an over-sized cowboy hat, sprinkling the country aspect. They managed to take rowdy bar rock and make it indie rock-friendly. By the middle of the set, Custer took over on keys for a few songs that gave them a bit of a new wave sound, which definitely added character to their outfit. After a few of the new wavey tunes they went back into rowdy rock, playing some tried and true three-chord rockers (see "Louie Louie" or "Wild Thing" as reference). They finalized, and summarized their set by having a nice power pop sound that would make Elvis Costello happy. They played with a lot of energy, and had the crowd dancing. The band was in good spirits, as it was the last day of the tour, and it was bassist Elena Fox's birthday. Most of the audience, guys and gals alike, were drooling over her.
Dressy Bessy
Dressy Bessy
Headliners, Dressy Bessy, took no time sound checking, or even introducing themselves. They just went straight into their set. Everyone quickly and eagerly rushed up to the stage. They automatically had everyone dancing with their female-fronted, cutesy twee-pop songs. They were the epitome of fun. They play punk-pop songs that make you want to dance. Some of the songs were raw garage-punk, like a female-fronted version of the Stooges. Others were playful and innocent, much like The Vaselines. Like a real rock guitarist, John Hill (who also plays in Apples In Stereo) broke his A string during a solo and managed to finish the song, and later broke his D string, also during a solo. Now that's just impressive. During the song "Electrified", the title track from the album, "Electrified", all of the members of Squuaks bum-rushed the stage to help out on the song, using tambourines, clapping along, and one band member used two beer bottles as percussion. That was a definite highlight of the set.
All three bands delivered a good show and the night was consistently fun, however the climax of the night by far was Dressy Bessy, a band you don't want to miss if they come around again, unless of course you hate catchy songs and fun times.

Myrtle Beach Underground 101 (from Surge 9/11/08)

http://www.thesunnews.com/static/weeklysurge/2008%20archives/091108%20archives/main091108.html


By Michael Wood
For Weekly Surge
On Friday, House of Blues will host Myrtle Beach Rocks - The Amp, featuring a few of Myrtle Beach's biggest rock bands: Silenced, Hand Grenade, Circles in Autumn, and Zero Motivation. House of Blues has helped many bands by giving them exposure. Bands like Confliction and Sqwearl have headlined H.O.B. And other local bands were given the chance to open up for national acts. Circles In Autumn opened for Opeth recently as did Silenced for '90s rockers Live, and Something About Vampires and Sluts opened for Orgy back in 2004. Also this year Hand Grenade opened for Pennywise at the 2,000-capacity venue.
Even before H.O.B., Myrtle Beach has had bands that have done everything they could to get some exposure, and to help create a music scene beyond the beach's main musical legacy, The Shag/beach music. Since the '80s, there have been plenty of attempts to redefine what is called "beach music." While The Drifters may have their place, there is also a place for down and dirty, do-it-yourself rock 'n' roll, right? We had The Drag, who signed to Island Records in the mid-'90s. They eventually broke up and were dropped from the label. There was Echo 7, who also signed a nice record deal and toured the country with Queensryche, but they broke up as well. Echo 7 was scheduled for a reunion show recently but due to bad weather had to reschedule.
Before Echo 7, the band's drummer, Jason Hearn was in a band called The Frownies, who did some extensive touring around the states. Some bands that still exist and have released records on national labels are The Classic Struggle, Something About Vampires and Sluts, Indifference, At Half Mast (who just got back from a European tour), and The Independents (who have toured with The Ramones, The Misfits, Blink 182, and many more) just to name a few.
Where does this magic happen?
Let's just say you won't find it at the Shag-happy Society of Stranders' Fall Migration that runs Friday through Sept. 21 in Ocean Drive section of North Myrtle Beach.
Come along with me as I take a journey into the Myrtle Beach area's original rock scene, taking a look at where it is now and how it compares to the halcyon days of the '90s. Is it dead, as some claim? Or is there a new generation pumping new blood into a slumbering beast? Or is it possible that there's a tight-knit network of bands and musicians thriving, just on a smaller scale and out of the general view?

ON THE HUNT

The date is Aug. 29. I pull up to an old abandoned-looking warehouse somewhere outside of Myrtle Beach and see a bunch of kids standing around. The place is called The Hazmat. It's the practice space for the band, Indifference, but tonight they are throwing a show with five different bands. "We wanted a place that people could be free to dance and check out some bands free of the bar scene" says Lee Fournier, one of the volunteers at The Hazmat. This place encourages dancing, moshing, skateboarding, but smoking and/or drinking is discouraged. Inside is like a garage. Equipment is all around, very dark, but with a well-lit stage area for the bands. The kids crowd in and enjoy every minute of it. This is just one of the few well-kept secrets of the Myrtle Beach underground music scene.
A couple of miles away, on the same night, The Classic Struggle is having its CD release party at The Brickhouse Lounge in Surfside Beach. Both shows seem to have packed houses. In recent times, most local original bands (those that play their own material as opposed to cover songs) have been playing at The Sound Garden (R.I.P.), Wimpy's Bar & Grill, The Clubhouse Myrtle Beach, and on some occasions, the House of Blues. But before that there were places like The Lazy i, a small record store on Seaboard Street in Myrtle Beach that had shows in its back room. National bands such as The Ataris, Dashboard Confessional, The Locust, and many more came through and played this garage-like space before they hit it big. After The Lazy i, there was The Limelight, a beer and wine only bar off U.S. 501 in Myrtle Beach. The owner of The Limelight, Kathy Wagner, eventually opened The Social on 9th Ave. N. in downtown Myrtle Beach, where bands such as The Misfits, Agent Orange, and many more played, along with a host of local acts.
But let's take a step back. Who started this mess?
"Well no bars would let us play so we usually just had house parties back in '85, but the first big show was Corrosion of Conformity Memorial Day weekend," says Darrel Cook, long-time local music veteran (Cook played guitar for the now-defunct local punk legend Bazooka Joe, and also played guitar and keys in The Independents). "We had The National Guard Armory rented out, but the day before the show they canceled on us. They said they were expecting so many arrests during bike week that it was going to be used as a holding cell." So they made some calls and somehow got it moved to The Burgess Community Center. Just by word of mouth, news of the show's move spread and organizers still got a couple hundred people out for a sweaty punk rock time.
Some of the first bands to get things rolling in Myrtle Beach were Scott Free, Mass Appeal, and Bazooka Joe. "Some of the redneck bars would give us their off nights, and when we'd pack the place (so) they'd ask us to stick around," says Cook. Some of the bars doing rock shows back then were Rays, Scuttles, Magic Bus, and Castaways. Castaways had a show with Operation Ivy and Bazooka Joe, and had more than 400 people show up. MDC and Screeching Weasel were also among the bands that played there. Heck, even before that, bands were playing at private residences in Myrtle Beach. Touring bands such as Neurosis and Jawbreaker played house parties. There was even a place called "The Hippy House" that hosted shows. "Funny thing, out of all the people that lived there, only one of them was a hippy" says Cook. Around 1992, people started renting out The Fireman's Clubhouse in Conway and having shows there. That was where The Drag (at the time just called Drag) had a cassette release party. But once this whole live music thing caught on and bars realized they could make some money, it became easier for bands to get gigs at places they didn't have to worry about cops shutting down. Places like The Headroom, Mr. Yucks, Club Zero, and many more gave bands such as Sqwearl, The Independents, and The Drag room to see some success. Some of the smaller bars like The Candlelight and Scuttles gave some younger punk bands such as The Hall Monitors, The Beatholes, Minus One, Dead Center, and The Humanoids a chance to play. This was around '97.

THE NEW MILLENNIUM

By 2000, there was The Lazy i. The Lazy i was a record store, a recording studio, and show space. Local bands and touring bands alike would play there every weekend. "One of my favorite music moments was when Song of Zarathustra played the Lazy i! It was just an all around good night. The crowd was awesome...kids drove from all over to come to the show...and it was just one of those nights where people were genuinely stoked to see the band and everyone was rocking out and singing along. I'm glad I was around for the era of the Lazy i. Small intimate punk rock venue, booking amazing bands," says Beth Graham, former keyboardist for Something About Vampires and Sluts.
Around the same time as the Lazy i was in full swing, another place that you could find just about every musician in town hanging out every Wednesday night was Alley Cats on the Super Block in downtown Myrtle Beach. It was first called Blues Alley, and then changed its name when it seemed obvious that very few blues acts being booked and a blues/jazz club, Gypsy's, was across the street.
Wednesday nights became a happening as Alley Cats hosted open mike night. "Those open mikes were so important. Bands like I,God and Planet Cock would just get up and play a few songs, then you had rappers and blues musicians that would get up there too. It was so diverse, and always fun," says Chrissy Kotsopoulos, keyboardist for SAVAS. Surge Editor, Kent Kimes, was even known to grace the stage of Alley Cats occasionally for some '80s jams. The Regime usually hosted the night and lent jammers their instruments if they didn't have their own.
Also another place where you could find local musicians doing their thing was Bodo's on Tuesday nights. Bodo's is a local German restaurant, but a few years ago on a Tuesday night you could also see The Regime or Sideways Derby hosting a night of drinks and music.
Around 2002, The Limelight opened. It was the same idea of The Lazy i, but with much more space and an actual stage. The record store from The Lazy i was moved into The Limelight, but eventually it closed. The Limelight started serving beer and wine and was having various events. This was a historical venue in its short time. The Limelight had a lot of touring acts come through and seemed to be one of the things that really helped the local hardcore and metal scene. Bands including The Classic Struggle played this venue, and at the same time international punk bands, such as The U.K. Subs and more, would come through. One historical show there was a Halloween weekend showcase. Local bands all played as other bands. Bands imitated were They Might Be Giants, The Cure, Taking Back Sunday, and many more.
Around the same time, local musician Phil Fox was arranging shows at a local coffee shop called The Living Room at 38th Ave. N. and U.S. 17 Bpyass in Myrtle Beach. It was a place where local bands such as The Beatholes, The Typewriters, Wicked Gift, and more would unplug and play acoustic. Surge's own Beerman columnist, Colin Burch was the owner of The Living Room. Surprisingly, they did not serve beer. But intimate acoustic open mike nights were served here, a sharp contrast to the noisy, raucous plugged-in open mike events at Alley Cats.
So what happened to The Lazy i and The Limelight? "Self sabotage. From day one I remember cleaning the parking lot every night at The Lazy i because kids just couldn't respect the place" says Kotsopoulos. So due to vandalism and trash being left in parking lots constantly, The Limelight was moved and the name was changed.
The owner of The Limelight, Wagner, then opened up The Social. The Social had a 700-person capacity and had a number of great shows. Some of the bigger bands to play were Badfinger, L.A. Guns, and Gym Class Heroes. The Social struck a deal with N.C.-based Planet Rock, but eventually ran out of funds and could not stay open and Planet Rock pulled out.
Back on Seaboard Street, next to the old Lazy i, there was a place called Monkey Business. It was a show space in the back, but in the front was a music and clothing store. "The Monkey Business days were the best days of my life. I want The Hazmat to be like that place" says Fournier.
By 2007, The Sound Garden was open in the building that housed Tim Clark's Rock-N-Roadhouse among various incarnations of restaurants and nightclubs on the south end of Myrtle Beach proper. Many people thought it would be the rebirth of the local music scene. And there were many very successful shows. In the short time that The Sound Garden was open, the venue hosted such acts as L.A. Guns, BulletBoys, and Kristopher Roe of The Ataris among many others. The Sound Garden is infamous for hosting the show where local rock band The Shark Legs went to battle with The BulletBoys. BB singer Marq Torien said a few disrespectful things about Shark Legs on stage so they confronted them. No one was physically harmed, but if it weren't for security, SharkLegs singer Ed Tanner would have punched Torien. Another show at The Sound Garden that will linger in lore is the Anti-Valentine's Day Party. The place was packed. In between bands people got on stage and told angry stories about ex-lovers. And Jimmy Awesome, singer of local rock band Wicked Awesomes, hosted the Anti-Valentine's Dating Show, where the premise was to get a hook up. Winners won sex toys, and runners-up won pornography. SAVAS, Old Scobes, Chicken Day, and Here's Looking At You Kid played.

THE HERE AND NOW

So what is the Myrtle Beach music scene like these days? People seem to have different opinions. "There are three scenes. The indie scene, where a lot of younger kids are involved and you have bands like Wicked Gift, SAVAS, and Old Scobes. There's the metal scene. And then there's the original bands that play the cover circuit, like Psych Ward, Ten Toes Up, Sideways Derby, and The Regime" says Brian McKenzie, guitarist for Something About Vampires and Sluts, a slew of other bands, and recording studio owner/engineer.

Drew Jacobs, bassist of local band Wicked Gift and many others, sees it differently. "Myrtle Beach is a family-like structure. It's a tight knit circle with incredible bands," he says. Jacobs no longer lives in Myrtle Beach but drives down from Columbia almost every weekend to either play music or to see some of his favorite bands.
Along the Strand there are still a number of places for local bands performing original material to play. Starting in North Myrtle Beach, there is Pirates Cove. Almost every weekend Pirate's Cove has original touring and local bands. And every night on the bar's deck you can find local entertainment.
There is The Tiki at The Afterdeck on Restaurant Row, which hosts a number of parties geared toward dance, but occasionally will have concerts. Through the years bands such as Bad Brains, Sqwearl, B-52s, and many others have graced the stage, when it was known simply as The Afterdeck. Most recently Agent Orange played with SAVAS, Shark Legs, and Hand Grenade.
Hangovers is a newer bar that just hit its one-year anniversary. It's only a block from the beach and it has been having many original bands play of late. It's a small place, which just means a nice intimate gathering of local rockers.
Fresh Brewed Coffee House near Myrtle Beach City Hall is a coffee shop that hosts local bands often. Younger bands such as The Wicked Awesomes, Bottlecap Bandits, and many others play there, and many of the artier shows can be found there. Electric Bird Noise just recently had a CD release party there.
The Clubhouse Myrtle Beach is one of the most important places right now for local musicians.
Nearly every weekend you'll find local musicians rocking the small stage in the corner. Just recently Wheatus, famous for that 2000 tune "Teenage Dirtbag," came through and rocked The Clubhouse. Most recently there was a hurricane party for Tropical Storm Hanna, where the electricity actually went out twice while local party rock band Hand Grenade was playing. The Wet Teens and Baboon Brigade were also on the bill.
Wimpy's Bar & Grill, formerly The Surf Shack, is a place that bands have also been playing a lot lately. Wimpy's hosts a range of local musicians going all the way from hip-hop to classic rock to heavy metal, and this place picked up many of the shows booked at The Sound Garden, which shut down in the spring.
The Brickhouse Lounge, which is connected to Surfside Bowling Center, is a place where you can see local bands (and bowl a few frames). As mentioned before, The Classic Struggle just had its CD release party there. One of the most memorable moments of The Brickhouse history was seeing Corey Feldman's band perform there. Feldman and crew were absolutely horrible but it was an amazing time.
And of course, you can find local music at the House of Blues. So when you go see Myrtle Beach Rocks - The Amp on Friday, remember that this local music scene has an underground history. Even the bands playing Friday have historical people involved. Silenced features Jody Lewis, who was the front man of local punk band Minus One back in 1992. Zero Motivation features Joey Skipper, who helped form legendary local ska outfit Strike-O-Matics. Circles In Autumn's lead singer Shaun Brown used to own 007 Hard Rock Tavern, which was a venue for both touring and local rock bands. Hand Grenade is made up of newbies to the Myrtle Beach scene being that they moved here from New Jersey, but the band features two deejays from local rock radio station WKZQ: Jersey and Dr. J.
So if you want to go shagging at the beach, there are plenty of places to do that. But if you want to see some local talent, there are also places to do that. Bands like Flick It, The Izm, Circles In Autumn, The Classic Struggle, The SharkLegs, and many many more can be found playing to fans up and down the strand doing their best to make sure Myrtle Beach does actually rock.
{Editor's note: Michael Wood is a member of Something About Vampires and Sluts, The Wet Teens and other bands, and he also books and promotes local concerts, and he was proprietor of the Lazy i record store.}

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Tracey Thorn Review

http://thehomegrownzine.com/archives/33


TRACEY THORN
NIGHT TIME EP
Review by Michael Wood
London’s indie pop darlings, The XX, attempted to put together a tribute album for themselves, which for one reason or another did not see the light of day. Amongst the artists invited to participate in this compilation was Tracey Thorn, most noted for being the voice of Everything But The Girl. Since it was never released, Thorn decided to release the song anyway on an EP, accompanied with some remixes of the song “Swimming”, from her album “Love and The Opposite”. The XX’s version of “Night Time” is airy, emotive, and slow building. While Thorn was able to keep a similar atmosphere, she came at it with an electro-pop vibe, and her personal flare made the song even more beautiful than it already was. An extra bonus on this ep are the “Swimming” remixes, which would probably only be valuable to those who are already familiar with the song, but nonetheless keep the mood that was set from the beginning of the EP, and are interesting takes on the song. In order to fully appreciate this EP, you should own The XX’s self titled debut, and Tracey Thorn’s “Love and The Opposite”, but that doesn’t stop this from being a completely enjoyable release on any level. (Merge Records)

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Citizen Fish article, Ghetto Blaster Magazine


Citizen Fish
Words: Michael Wood

In the mid to late 90s, ska-punk made a big explosion into the mainstream.  Although less clawingly-annoying than the swing music revival that followed, it still quickly became an overdone and misused genre.  The popular though lackluster, MTV-style fusion of the genres left mainstream public ignorant to the fact that there were and still are some very creative, raw, talented ska-punk bands out there. While bands like The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Reel Big Fish, and Sublime were playing Clear Channel venues and filling the soundtracks to Good Burger, 10 Things I Hate About You and Clueless, Citizen Fish was playing the “other side of town” to a pack of sweaty punks for a $5 cover charge.

Citizen Fish has been at it since 1989 and were on the forefront of the ska-punk movement.  Though new at the time, the idea of mixing the two genres seemed like simple science for them.  “We were all brought up on Sex Pistols and The Specials, so it was only a matter of time before the idea had to happen! It certainly felt like really fresh music,” says Dick Lucas, singer for the band. 

Lucas has been singing heavily-politically themed punk songs since 1980 and is also the singer for the anarchist punk band Subhumans and another ska punk band, Culture Shock. Being in bands since the age of 18, Lucas has stuck to his guns, and feels that the social messages he was portraying in the beginning are still relevant now. “The stances taken in 1980 were less considered, subtle, deep than 30 years later, but weren't contradictory to how I now think. I do see things differently now, but only in as much as I’ve more information and experience to draw from. For example, all that teenage paranoia has just about gone now, but mostly because I discovered we are all being watched! So songs about paranoia evolve to songs about CCTV and phone tapping.”

Releasing records for over two decades, Citizen Fish has worked with such notable labels as Southern, Lookout!, Fat Wreck and Dick’s own, Bluurg!.  Their newest record, Goods is out on another new label, Alternative Tentacles, a veteran label run by Jello Biafra, founder of punk rock legends Dead Kennedys - which seems to be just the right aesthetic for Citizen Fish. “We've known Jello and Jesse (Townley, Alternative Tentacles general manager) for years, so it’s more co-operation than 'business.' Jello said about a year ago he'd be into releasing the next album, so we went with it. Alternative Tentacles is a good label with a rare diversity of music and a good reputation.”

Take raw, sincere punk rock with ska and reggae influences, turn it up, and you have Goods.  Granted, the formula is nothing new, but when you do it as good as Citizen Fish do, you just don’t want to fix what isn’t broken.  “We feel, without sounding too immodest, that it’s the best album we've done yet! There's no 'could be better' songs, nothing we'd like to re-record, and it was exciting and fun getting it worked out and recorded,” says Lucas. 

They also try to keep the experience of seeing them live as close as possible to hearing them on record, by not buying into all the new technology that is at hand at recording studios these days. “They can turn farts into harps, any sound can be twisted reversed retuned moved around. It’s almost cheating! We still play as before in the studio, do as much live as possible, so we don’t need to get surgical later on.”

Managing to stay active for as long as Citizen Fish has, without “selling out” to a major or anything else they might deem questionable to the integrity of the band, has not been easy, but seems to be worth it.  When asked if it has been financially easy to survive, Lucas stated “For each of us the answer would vary, ranging from broke most of the time to managing to stay out of work for the last 25 years. Money from album sales and gigs fluctuates like mad. Once you take into account the fact that being on a major label only means loads of money if you sell loads of product - otherwise all those upfront wads have to be paid back - then we just feel lucky to have been able to survive off what we do without ripping anyone off or selling our souls to the industry.”

Dinosaur Jr. show review

Dinosaur Jr. @ Cat’s Cradle, Carrboro, NC June 27

Dinosaur Jr., perhaps the loudest non-metal band on earth, decided to do a tour playing their arguably most-noted album, “Bug” in it’s entirety.  An odd yet intriguing additive to the tour was that they were to bring along Henry Rollins with them, not performing, really, but to interview the band onstage, before they play.  So, on Monday, June 27 Carrboro’s own Cat’s Cradle was filled up with hipsters and music geeks, ready and willing to get their eardrums blown.  I was sad to see that this date, unlike the other dates of this tour, did not include OFF!, Keith Morris of Black Flag and Circle Jerks new band, but was happy to see that Mac McCaughn of Superchunk would be opening the show. Being a Chapel Hill native, McCaughn would be at home at The Cradle, but being one of the only times playing solo, it seemed to be a new experience for him.  Surprisingly, he did not play an acoustic set, but played Superchunk songs just as loud and distorted as if he was playing with the band, something that took a few songs to get used to, but eventually felt right.  He played a slew of Superchunk songs such as “Driveway to Driveway”, “Digging For Something”, and “Martinis on The Roof”, and threw in a cover of The Misfits song “Children in Heat”, which he dedicated to Rollins' tattoos. 

After McCaughn finished up his set, Rollins came on stage to say a few words before introducing Dinosaur Jr.  When the band came out and the interview started rolling, I couldn’t help wonder what the purpose of all this was.  It just seemed odd, that a guy like J Mascus, that had seemed to be pretty soft spoken and mysterious (or maybe just too stoned to talk much) would want to be interviewed on stage.  But nonetheless, it was entertaining.  No questions were particularly hard-hitting or controversial, although one statement that Rollins made about how some bands get together after years of being broken up, and don’t really do anything new, but DJ has been creating new music, sparked Lou Barlow to grunt “THE PIXIES”, which of course was good for a “oh no he didn’t” moment. 

After the interview was over, DJ left the stage for a few minutes.  Looking up at the stage, I noticed there were so many amps, that there was barely any room for the drum kit.  I took this as a cue to insert my earplugs.  They opened the set with two non- “Bug” songs: “Forget The Swan” (from their first album, “Dinosaur”), and “In a Jar” (from their second album, “You’re Living All Over Me”.  Then played “Bug”, all songs in order of album.  For the last song, “Don’t”, Barlow invited audience members up to scream the lyrics, which of course are just “why don’t you like me” over and over.  For their encore, they played their version of The Cure’s “Just Like Heaven” and “Tarpit”, another song from “You’re Living All Over Me”. 

As the night ended, most left happy, and happier were those who remembered to wear earplugs.  

Crooked Fingers review

http://thehomegrownzine.com/archives/159
After Eric Bachman’s short hiatus from music, he has come back with vengeance: a slew of Archers of Loaf reunion shows, as well as AOL reissues coming out this year and next, and now a new Crooked Fingers album. “Breaks In The Armor” is the 6th full length by Crooked Fingers, and by far the most consistently enjoyable yet.
At this point, Bachman and co. have mastered the art of mixing grit and pop, from dark humor and honesty (lyrics like “went to see my fortune teller to see which way the winds were blowin’, she said ‘you’ll probably get the cancer’, she said ‘you’ll surely die alone’” from “Bad Blood” for example) to truly catchy hooks. The production lent by Matt Yelton, The Pixies live sound engineer, is slightly more straightforward than previous CF efforts, songs being more stripped down and raw than the sometimes overly textured sound explored in the past. The bare bones production is a welcome ingredient to these heartfelt songs, showcasing the actual songs, and not getting lost in production. “Breaks In the Armor” plays like a bloody open wound turned beautiful.

Beard Science

Cover story of Surge, Feb. 17, 2011

http://www.thesunnews.com/2011/02/17/1986092/beard-science.html


From the beginning of mankind there was hair.
It grows on our heads, on our backs, on our toes, near the naughty bits, and for males (and occasionally some females), on our faces. Beards have been a major feature in most aspects of our history, from important religious and political figures, to respected authors, philosophers and artists. And one interesting thing about the beard is that there are hundreds of styles, from the Donegal to the Garibaldi. It's not always an issue of just not being able to, or wanting to shave. Men have been styling their beards and mustaches in search of the perfect face companion since we had a choice as to what to do with that stuff growing on our faces.
Many of our country's most important historical figures wore beards. Abraham Lincoln wore a beard (and we're not talking about wife Mary Todd Lincoln). Two of the most famous generals who commanded the Southern armies during the American Civil War, Robert E. Lee and Stonewall Jackson, both wore beards, as did many other generals. Many political leaders and revolutionaries throughout history have been known to have a beard and/or mustache.
In the 18th and 19th centuries, only the wealthy shaved often. Daily shaving was not a custom until the 20th century. Although straight razors were used in England since the 1600s, it was not until the 1900s that Gillette introduced the common store-bought razor. From the '20s to the present, it would be highly unlikely to see someone on Wall Street, or in any business office environment with a full-grown, burly beard. And the U.S. has not seen a president with facial hair since William Howard Taft, who was elected in 1908. In the '70s it seems that beards were most popular with hippies and rock 'n' rollers, and mustaches had a porn star/underground sex club stigma attached to them. Professional baseball players were somehow exempt from this stigma, however, with Rollie Fingers' trademark handlebar mustache and Bill "Mad Dog" Madlock's Ice Cube-ish scruff. In the '80s Tom Selleck, as Magnum P.I., took back the upper lip push broom and made it acceptable for every man in the workplace to have a 'stache. By the time the '90s hit, a goatee and its cousin, the van dyke (a goatee plus mustache), were perhaps the only acceptable facial hair in the workplace.
Beards and mustaches have also been present in most forms of pop culture through the ages. In sports there's Brian Wilson, from the San Francisco Giants, and Kimbo Slice, a famous mixed martial arts fighter. Possibly the most famous beard in sports right now is Brett Keisel of the Pittsburgh Steelers, who was recently invited to judge at the 2011 National Beard and Mustache Championships, in Lancaster, Pa. Although he has stated that he will shave soon. On the big screen, there's always been Groucho Marx, Charlie Chaplin, Chuck Norris, Mr. T, and many more, but more recently you have Brad Pitt, Zach Galifianakis, and Joaquin Phoenix on the beard wagon, although Phoenix has been seen clean-shaven recently.
From the world of entertainment to well-paid athletes to average Joes, beards and 'staches are sprouting like it's the '80s all over again- the 1880s, that is.
Beard enthusiasts seem to be everywhere. There are national competitions, clubs, and Web sites, devoted solely to facial hair. Even in The Palmetto State. On Saturday, the 2nd Annual Southeastern Beard & Moustache Championships will be held in Charleston. Beard and mustache competitions have been popular for years in Europe. The first World Beard and Mustache Championship took place in Höfen-Enz, Germany, in 1990. The idea eventually hit the U.S. hard, spawning a USA beard team, and many events nationally. Jack Passion, a beard wearer from California, was the first American to win at The European Mustache and Beard Championship, held in Brighton, England. He is also the author of "The Facial Hair Handbook." Passion stated in a recent interview for buildabeard.com, "European competitions are very structured with a lot of rules. American competitions are wild and crazy, they are borderline riots."
Paul Roof, organizer of Southeastern Beard & Moustache Championships, strives for something in between the two extremes. "We will have a red carpet entrance, professional photographers, and there's serious judging with some really nice prizes. It is, however, a drinking affair, and the crowd gets rowdy. We don't want it stuffy but we do have formalities."
While Myrtle Beach may not have it's own Beard Team USA chapter yet, the beach has gotten quite a bit hairier in the past few years. If you are a local who happens to go see live music, go to bars, art shows, heck, even the mall, it's hard not to find at least one proud beard or mustache carrier. In Myrtle Beach most local bands have at least one beard-o. From Octopus Jones, to Ten Toes Up, to The Classic Struggle, very few bands go completely facial-hairless.
Nationally, beards and mustaches have no doubt been most represented in music in the past 50 years. Many styles of music have bearded musicians, from jazz to country and bluegrass, to polka. But most interesting is the trend in rock 'n' roll. Many rockers have either flirted with it or dived head first into it. From Queen to ZZ Top to David Bowie, to Mick Jagger, Frank Zappa, The Beatles, The Beach Boys, and so many more. However, in the past few years, beards have become more popular than ever with bands such as The Black Keys, The Avett Brothers, Fleet Foxes, Band of Horses, Kings of Leon, Iron and Wine, and many more. And the fans have caught on. There is even a popular blog site called "beard makes better music" on blogspot.com where the author states, "We seriously believe that bearded men make better music. The support for our theory is huge." The site focuses on modern bearded bands.
Getting into beard-ness
Everyone seems to have different ways and inspirations for getting into beard-ness. "I haven't shaved in three years, it started as almost a personal challenge, to see how far I would go with it," says Drew Jacobs, a local musician who plays in bands such as Something About Vampires and Sluts, Wicked Gift, and The Drew Jacobs Band. Mike Wisner, another local musician, on the other hand says, "I just woke up one day and I had a beard. I never made a decision to have a beard, it was a decision to stop shaving." Both Wisner and Jacobs have fully grown, bushy beards with rounded bottoms. Beard enthusiasts call this style the Garibaldi.
As far as inspiration, Evil Presley, singer of the regional punk band The Independents, had an interesting source. "Since I was 16, I was a huge fan of (Marvel Comics character) Wolverine. I would shave six times a day just to try to help my burns grow out." Presley's style is known as mutton chops, which are sideburns that extend all the way down to imaginary lines drawn downward from the corners of the mouth.
Others seem to be sentimental about their beard and 'stache growing decision. "When I was a kid I remember my grandfather had a killer goatee and all the older folks seem to have mustaches," says Whilden Nettles, a local musician. Nettles sports the Hollywoodian, a mustache connected to a beard in which the sideburns are removed. "My Dad has always had one," says Mick Forrest, a local visual artist. "But another influence is the fact that I just really like a vintage look. There was a fashion in the '30s that's hard to recreate." Forrest has a handlebar, a mustache where the sides are twisted or curl upward or outward on the ends.
Some people grow their face fuzz out of rebellion. "Girlfriends and jobs would never let me grow the 'stache out, then finally I just did it out of rebellion." says Nathan Troutman, a local musician who sports The Pencil, also known as Undercover Brother, a thin mustache along the upper lip.
"I think when I first started, it was dumb-ass youthful rebellion, which in hindsight, doesn't make much sense, seeing as it's so accepted," says Carl Beckham, an English professor at Horry-Georgetown Technical College, who sports the Hollywoodian.
And for some people a fashion statement isn't really what's on their mind. "I don't have to go to work so I just got lazy, thought I'd go for the homeless look," says Ed Tanner, of local rock band Sharklegs. Economics played into another beard-sporter's decision to let it grow. "Razors are expensive and I got no chin," says Brandon Collins, from Myrtle Beach metal band, The Classic Struggle. Both Tanner and Collins have Garibaldis.
Fashion or fusion?
You can look at the popularity of beards and facial hair in the music and arts scenes in many ways. The so-called "ironic" mustache that hipsters started sporting years ago just isn't so ironic anymore. For those of you unfamiliar with the term "hipster," it is defined by urbandictonary.com as "a subculture of men and women typically in their 20s and 30s that value independent thinking, counter-culture, progressive politics, an appreciation of art and indie-rock, creativity, intelligence, and witty banter." But when it comes to mustaches, it's not really hip or independent anymore when everybody's sporting 'em.
"It's a trend in all the big cities. I was recently in Athens, Ga. just sitting down at a coffee shop, and I noticed that every guy in the place had a mustache," says Troutman. "If I lived in a bigger city, I wouldn't have one, but this is kind of my 'fuck you' to Myrtle Beach."
As Surge has chronicled many times before, trends take awhile to gain traction along the beach. "Myrtle Beach is always 5-10 years behind," said Brian Sisco, Garibaldi wearer and manager of local bar For What It's Worth, which happens to have a good number of beard-wearing employees.
But with so many types and styles of facial hair at a man's disposal, stereotypes are being broken down; i.e. just because you've got a sweet goatee doesn't mean you're a beatnik poet, or the shaggy, ZZ Top-esque beard touching your chest might mean you're into metal, rather than a traveling Spreadhead.
"I was traveling with Phish when I first started growing my facial hair. Now social groups have meshed," says Forrest. "Scenesters and hippies are listening to the same stuff. There has always been beards in the hippy scene."
Roof agrees that fusion is behind the trend. "A lot of these bands, like The Avett Brothers, for example, are heavily influenced by bluegrass. And beards have been a part of bluegrass culture from the beginning."
While there are elements of trend following attached to the beard phenomenon, some feel it's more than just a fashion fad at this point. It seems to be more of a lifestyle statement. Nettles stated, "like a lot of trends. It hit and spread. But this spread because, unlike skinny jeans, there's a subconscious element that's there. On the surface it might be funny or ironic looking, but it hit on something and it's more significant and psychological than certain trends."
Maybe growing beards is a symbol for the younger generation to say, "hey look, I'm a grown man."
"Our generation is stunted," said Nettles. "We lengthen our adolescence, and this is one way to prove we are adults. Some people do it ironic but I think there are some deep seeded manifestations."
Is it that the 20-30 something generation right now has such a hard time growing up, that we need to have our facial hair to prove we are adults? Or is our generation rebelling against the 9-to-5 lifestyle our parents may have gravitated towards, or perhaps a backlash against the metrosexual movement of the early 2000s?
"As you see the country economically down spiral, you see less people get white collar jobs," says Sisco. "Dealing with a generation of ex-hippies that sold out, we despise their choices. The 20-30 something generation is college educated but doesn't want to go the route our parent did."
Maybe men are being men again; after a decade of scrubbing, manicuring, waxing and primping.
Roof says, "Metrosexuailty is over. We are fed up with being told how to look."
Jacobs agrees that there is a sense of rebellion in a nice beard, but is more romantic about it. "I think about all those bands from the '70s with big thick, bushy, beards, and it just symbolizes creativity, rebellion, and just being different. My uncle always had a beard, and he looked like a rebel, a rock 'n' roller, and I like that".
The razor's edge
Although beards are definitely in the mainstream these days, some bearded folks still fall victim to disapproving judgment. "People look at you and say derogatory things. But the beard is good a filter. If someone is stupid, it comes out immediately," says Roof. "That way I don't have to waste my time on ignorant people."
Jacobs gets funny looks from strangers. "They think I may be a criminal or a vagrant. They just aren't sure what to expect."
Some people, however, are just intrigued by the facial art. Forrest states "people are just generally interested. 'How long did it take', 'Do you wax it', and questions like that." The answers are " four months" and "yes."
While facial hair might blackball you from getting certain jobs, some people actually need it. As Nettles was working as a police officer, he said he needed an edge. "Without the beard I look so young," he said. "I needed the beard for respect. I don't want to get my ass beat."
And facial hair adding a few years in the eyes of beholders does seem to be a common theme. "I just like not looking 17. If I shaved, I'd look so young," says Ryan "Kickass" Carter, drummer for Sharklegs. Carter has a Fu Manchu, a mustache that extends downward on the sides, usually extending off of the chin.
Collins doesn't mind the attention. "Some cringe and some absolutely love it, especially drunk chicks. They always try to braid it. Also, puppies and babies are fond of the beard. They always try to eat it."
Beckham says, "I get mistaken for a hippy. Someone asked me the other day if I was going to see (the jam band) Galactic and I didn't know what to say."
The bearded lady
Meanwhile, beard and mustaches seem to get mixed reactions from the ladies.
"I think the beard has some major sex appeal. Some girls are really turned on by it, although some don't like it at all," says Jacobs.
Wisner agrees. "They either love it or hate it, not much in between."
But it can be an ice breaker.
"The ladies are intrigued, they say 'can I play with that?' 'Can I stroke it', and I say 'oh, you mean my beard?" says Sisco.
And a nice beard can be good for your self-esteem.
"I think it seems to add a layer of confidence," says Forrest.
On the other hand, not all ladies love the face fro.
Abbi Neal-Ingalls, from the "T and A Morning Show" on local classic rock station WAVE 104 has been very vocal about this. "I absolutely loathe beards," she says. "My husband has one, and he looks like the Brawny man. Some women like the mountain man look, but not me. It looks creepy, like a mug shot. It's getting ridiculous. Good looking guys are hiding their faces."
To convince her husband to shave his beard she has begged and pleaded. She even wore a paper beard on her face for a few days. As a last resort, she may threaten to cut off the booty flow. "I hate use it as a weapon. But I may have to cut him off," she said. He eventually shaved it down to a goatee.
Some gals feel it depends on the individual. Alice Torres, a 21-year-old local, says, "If you don't have a good mustache, why have it at all? But a good mustache can be very hot."
Some women in the world of entertainment have mustaches, and we're not simply talking about the circus freak bearded ladies. Coco Rosie, a popular indie-rock female duo, have been known to sport fake mustaches from time to time, and JD Samson from the now-defunct band Le Tigre actually has a mustache - on purpose. Female mustaches actually became a hipster trend, as documented by blog site "hipster girls in mustaches" on blogspot.com. It has become very common to see mustaches tattooed on a girl's finger so they can hold a nice stache up to their face when desired. These are called fingerstaches.
Not fade away?
Sometimes beards can be problematic though. "From time to time I find goodies in it. Usually after a night of raging" says Collins.
And like the hair on top of your head, you have to apply some product if you don't want to smell like a vagrant.
"I hate when it starts to smell bad. I've had that complaint," says Carter. "When it was growing out, my beard had dandruff, but I quickly learned to condition it," says Wisner. But the beard wearers of Myrtle Beach aren't going to give up just because of a little case of the dandruff and the smellies. No sir.
Some popular musicians are over it though. As a matter of a fact, two of the most popular beard toting bands in America have recently shaven members. Dan Auerbach of The Black Keys shaved, as did both Scott and Seth Avett, of The Avett Brothers.
Is the trend dying? "The Avetts and Auerbach cutting their beards could be to indie-rock as Metallica cutting their hair was to heavy metal. Maybe some fair-weather fans will shave," says Beckham.
Jacobs doesn't think so. "I don't think it will make an impact. It was going on well before bands were having success." Forrest adds, "it's been an underground trend for a while. It may bounce back and forth for younger people, but older people will keep the phenomenon alive. I think it's just getting started."
Whiskers, by nature, are resilient.
"The beautiful thing about beards is that they grow back no matter what," says Roof.


Read more: http://www.thesunnews.com/2011/02/17/1986092/beard-science.html#ixzz1fmp9G713

Furs Review

http://www.thesunnews.com/2011/07/12/2274255/psychedelic-furs-at-house-of-blues.html

If you grew up in the '80s, or even the '90s, you probably know who The Psychedelic Furs are, or at the very least you are familiar with the hit song "Pretty in Pink" from the movie "Pretty in Pink." If you are younger than 30, and don't know who The Psychedelic Furs are, but enjoy indie/alternative music, you should. The Furs took punk and new wave to a new level, combining a moody post-punk (ala Bauhaus, Siouxsie and The Banshees, early Cure) attitude with the new-romantic warmness of bands such as Modern English, The Church, Echo and The Bunnymen and more, actually being precursors to some of those bands, becoming one of the most influential bands of the '80s. The band's music was even heavily covered in the `90s by punk bands such as Jawbreaker, Face To Face, and Good Riddance, just to name a few. The band's second and perhaps most noted album, "Talk Talk Talk," was released in 1981. To commemorate the 30-year anniversary of the album, the band set out on tour playing the "Talk Talk Talk" in its entirety. Luckily, Myrtle Beach was granted with the presence of these rock veterans. This was an early show, starting at 7 p.m. sharp, with no opening act. When The Furs hit the stage, attendance was sparse yet seemed to be slowly filling up still. I don't think everyone realized how early the show was starting. The current lineup includes only two original members, brothers Richard Butler (vocals) and Tim Butler (bass), but consists of an all-star lineup of sorts. On guitar, Rich Good, who is also in the band Kings and Queens, but is mostly noted for being in the band The Pleased, which included semi-famous freak-folker Joanna Newsom, before going solo. Mars Williams, on saxophone, has played with The Waitresses (remember "I Know What Boys Like"?), Billy Idol, Ministry, and many other bands. Amanda Kramer, on keys, is mostly noted for playing with '80s electro-rock band Information Society. Paul Garisto, on drums, has played with Iggy Pop, Ryan Adams, David Gahan (of Depeche Mode) and many more. They opened the set with the lush and dark "Dumb Waiter" which seemed like a good opener to ease into the night, but then jumped right into the biggest hit "Pretty In Pink," which seemed like a bold move, but gave everyone the notion that they weren't fuckin' around, and were there to party (despite the line of water bottles and red bull cans on the drum riser, ala typical aging rock stars). Richard Butler has held his attitude through all the years, if not gaining some, coming off more like a sassy cockney punk rocker than a gloomy crooner, an image which he has been known for in the past. The on-stage chemistry with the band was that of a new one, as the players seemed to be simply having loads of fun with each other, and lacking the resentment and humdrumness that is sometimes displayed by veteran bands due to years of going at it. The first set, which was the entire "Talk Talk Talk" album (not in order), ended with "She is Mine," which included a long instrumental break with Williams taking lead on sax, and featuring Good's lush guitar, bringing to mind just about every John Hughes film I've ever watched. After completing "Talk Talk Talk" the band took a short break. When they returned to stage they started with the dark and sensual "Sister Europe," where Richard Butler acted out every word of the song, including mimicking smoking a cigarette. The second set quickly became even better than the first, with the hit "Love My Way" and "President Gas" setting the mode to the more anthem-like side of The Furs. In "High Wire Days" Richard Butler even pulled out a megaphone and sang through it for the later potion of the song. They ended this set with another hit, "Heartbreak Beat," which seemed like a great way to end the night. But then the band came out for an encore with some deep cuts, such as "My Time" and "Forever Now." The show was over by 9 p.m., just in time for all the old rockers to get home for the 10 o' clock news, while all the young indie rock kids stayed at home listening to Arcade Fire, failing to go straight to the source, and missing out on an important history lesson. Eh, kids these days.

Read more: http://www.thesunnews.com/2011/07/12/2274255/psychedelic-furs-at-house-of-blues.html#ixzz1fmnBwm42

Monday, October 17, 2011

Hell Foods

Me and Nicole had decided, for some reason to go hitchhiking.  We wanted to go to Chapel Hill.  We got as far as Cary, NC.  I actually used to work at the Whole Foods in Cary, so we went into the Whole Foods, and asked around as to if anyone that worked there lived in Chapel Hill.  One guy pointed a lady out.  She said "yes I do, why?" and I said "hey!  I used to work here!  Me and Nicole are trying to get to Chapel Hill, think we can get a ride?"  She said "OK, but I don't get off for a couple of hours".  So to kill the time, i said "hey lets get jobs here and just work for 2 hours then quit!" So i asked them if there was anything we could do and they got us started.  Next thing I knew there was this little 8 year old girl following me around, tormenting me.  When no one was looking, except for me, her face would turn red and horns would pop out on her forehead.  She was a demon.  For real.  I tried to tell people but no one would listen. They thought I was crazy.  Right before our newfound friend was getting off and we were going to get a ride, I looked outside, and the sky went grey, and a weird light was in the sky.  I looked like a zipper.  Next thing I knew, Whole Foods was on fire.  Everyone started running for thier lives.  I walked outside, fixated on the light in the sky, and then watched the entire whole foods be scooped up by this light.  Turns out Whole Foods was some sort of Portal to hell.  Well then the religious freaks came in to fix the situation.  These guys seamed worse than the demons.  We were taken away, and everyone was "exorsized", and bassically we were all at theses God camps.  There was a cardboard cutout of one of the evangelists in front of me and I was so pissed that I punched the cardboard preacher as hard as I could.  Then I heard my girlfriend crying.  I opened my eyes and I had actually punched my girlfriend, who was sleeping next to me, in the face.  Fuck you, weird dream!

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

for christsnakes, you have forsnaken me, snake and potatoes, snake on me

I was driving home, and as I was pulling into my parking space I saw a huge snake in my spot.  I freaked out, drove around the parking lot a few times, then finally decided to drive over it.  I think it was dead already because it was just laying there, but I had to be on the safe side.  So i drove over it a few times until I heard it's skull pop.
My first thought was that it was a girl that was mad at me that put the snake there.  I didn't really think that, but I kinda did. Later, when the girl came over to put a collection of letters on my doorstep, she saw the dead snake and was wondering why the hell it was there.  She was upset when she heard that I ran over it.  She likes snakes, I hate them.
My second thought was that I killed one of my neighbors pets.
I went to the property manager to let her know that there was a dead snake in my driveway.  Her reaction was "oh you might be seeing some more of those.  we put moth balls around the apartments and they are coming out from underneath."
So far, I have not seen anymore.  But if I do, i'm fucking moving.